What if God were here

I was thinking today about how things would change if I pictured Jesus standing next to me as I went about my day. When I was in high school I saw a skit that depicted this idea. The teenager had Jesus following him around and he of course changed what he would normally do and say because Jesus was right there. The thing is though, Jesus is always right here. He is always with us. Most of the time I forget the reality of this truth. He can be a constant source of strength to make the choice to do the right thing, to say the kind thing, to turn the other cheek. I was thinking in terms of relationships with the people around us, how it would change how we speak to others if we remembered God is listening. That He loves that person so much, that He sent His Son to die for that person as well as us. Would we choose to let an injustice slide instead of rise to the challenge? Would we choose to give love in the face of anger? Could we have the strength to love when it’s not returned? I think that is the most shining example of God’s love…. When flawed imperfect people choose to love beyond human ability, to love with God’s love. There is no way other than through Christ. It’s a choice. God gives us all the tools we need to make the choice, to choose love, hope and peace. I pray that I will choose these daily and remember God is here….. Right here with me always.

When God Shows Up

We have a small group that meets in our house every week to discuss life, our walk with God, and they have very quicky become apart of our family. Over the summer we have had each couple share a "stone" in their lives. A time when God has shown up in such a way that the only explanation is that it was Him working our the situation, that it was God showing up for them.
Tonight was the night for Scott and I to share about our "stone". It got me thinking about sharing one or two of the stories here on my blog. This one will be a small part of getting to know me and  how God has grown me over the last few years. So I will start a few years ago (ok maybe more than a few lol) when I was in eigth grade. I started wearing glasses that year. I still held everything right up to my nose. My grandpa used to tell me I was going to get ink on my nose from holding the book so close. I love to read. Anyway, then when I was 18 I got my drivers liscence and watch out! I was a horrible driver. 2 accidents within ayear of each other where I totaled my car(s) each time. Everyone thought I was just a reeeaallly bad driver but turns out I was slowly losing my central vision. I got married when I was 21 and got pregnant right away. It was during that year with a new baby that I started seeing a specialist in my area. After another year and 2 more babies (yes I said 2 but that's a story for another day) I was sent to a retinal specialist who told me if he didn't know I was in my 20's and he just looked at my scans he would have said I was 80 or 90 years old. He suggested I see another specialist this time in NYC. So off we went, Scott and I, to the city where his superb driving skills were put to the test and he passed with FLYING colors. :) The specialist there diagnosed me with cone dystrophy and we left with little hope that I would keep my eyesight and not go legally blind. Basically the doctor told us there was nothing he could do and good luck.
At this point I was very discouraged. I went home and was not able to drive. My oldest son was just starting preschool and I had the twins at home all day. I was completely dependant on my husband and others to take me anywhere, grocery shopping, church, etc. This was a very dark period of time for me. I never thought of myself as a control freak or someone who liked to be behind the wheel ( literally). Boy was I wrong. I was so angry, angry at God, angry at everyone who could drive lol I was just angry. Then I went thru self pity. Why would God let this happen to me.... Then over time and God's faithful pursuit of me, I came to a realization. it's not earth shattering or amazingly profound but it was life changing for me. Everyone has something they struggle with, everyone. Someitmes it's a disease, a temptation, addiction, fear, etc. but everyone has something that could put distance between them and God... if we let it. And no matter the circumstance it doesn't change God and it downs't change our own personal responsibility to respond to God's call on each of our lives. I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself and focus on what I could do for God not what I couldn't do.
After 6 months I went back to see the specialist in my area for a checkup, to see how my vision was progressing. I was still not out of my anger/self pity stage but I went anyway. I was not optimistic but God had other plans. My vision had improved! Enough that I could drive again. I was speechless. So was my doctor. He kept saying he didn't know how this happened but I knew and I was so grateful!
Recently I went for a second opinion and was diagnosed with macular dystrophy. Better diagnosis but similar disease. My vision has been stable for the last year and according to this doctor I should stay where I'm at. But I know that no matter what it's all in God's hands. I choose to trust, I choose to have faith, and I choose HOPE.

Ok So here goes nothing! :) Frst attempt at blogging. My name is Marissa and I am a wife and mother of 3. Life is busy but life is never boring. I've been thinking about just haveing a place to share my thoughts and favorite things so I thought blogging might be the way to do it!
I've been thinking alot about Hope lately, hence my blog title. When things are hard and life is often hard, what else do we have but hope. Hope and fairth that God has a plan. In Jeremiah God promises that He has a plan for us, a plan to prosper us and not to harm us. Some days that's all I hold onto. Other days are filled with the hope of heaven, of a better place. But always there is hope because of Jesus. Praise God for the gift of hope today. He loves you and He has a plan  even when it feels like there is no order or calm. God is our calm in any storm.